Come What May and Love It!!

This past week has been, as expected and emotional roller coaster. One minute I'll be happy and the next I'll be crying or really sad (on the verge of crying.) I know this is expected with a loss but...the hormones don't make it any better. :)!!!! As stated before I am so grateful for my family and friends...and the friends I have made, and the support they all have been. My sister in-law called me last week and reminded me of a talk given last year at the October conference. I loved the talk then and love it even more now. I was really down a couple nights ago and decided to pull the talk out that my sister in-law had made a reference to. It really made me feel so much better. Some of my favorite quotes from Elder Worthlin were: - If we approach adversities wisely, our hardest times can be times of greatest growth, which in turn can lead toward times of greatest happiness. - The dial on the wheel of sorrow eventually points to each of us. At one time or another, everyone must experience sorrow. No one is exempt. - The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude. - "God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son." the Lord Jesus Christ is our partner, helper, and advocate. He wants us to be happy. He wants us to be successful. If we do our part, He will step in. He who descended below all things will come to our aid. He will comfort and uphold us. He will strengthen us in our weakness and fortify us in our distress. He will make weak things become strong. I am so grateful for the gospel of Jesus Christ! I am grateful for a loving Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ, and I am grateful for a living prophet and apostles!! On a little different note: Paige has been so good these last couple weeks. I really think she is extra sensitive to my feelings. She has been extra cuddly when I've needed to just hold someone and cry and she has been there to make me smile and laugh when I needed it. Really she has been super funny this past week. I think I have laughed at her (or with her) many times during the day. She really is talking ALOT!!! I really don't know any different but from what I have been told its not common that they talk this much at her age. My dad even told me while I was at home..."Man if you think she talks alot now wait until she is supposed to be talking and then you'll really think she talks alot!" She also is mom's little helper and tries to do whatever I do. Whenever I am doing anything she says, " I help mom" and then she pushes her chair over to where I am and tries to help me make dinner, do the dishes, dust, clean the bathroom...you name it. She gets in the way sometimes but its really funny! She also loves her dolls right now. She will play with them all day. I love listening to her "take care" of them. She often says things to them that I say to her when I change her diaper, give her food, put her to bed and get her out of bed. Its so cute and really makes me smile. I love this little girl and feel so blessed to be her mother!!!

Paige changing her baby's diaper

Paige helping me make cookies! Paige helping me make chips and salsa Paige cleaning her toilet while I cleaned the "big" toilet. Paige just being her cute messy self!!!

Our Sweet Angel

Last Wednesday our sweet little Aubrey was born 4 months early. Her lungs weren't developed enough to stay in this world. The doctors and nurses weren't sure if our baby was going to have a heartbeat or not at birth. They tried to prepare us for both situations. Our sweet little girl was not born with a heartbeat thus considered a still born child. She weighed 9 oz and was 9 inches long.




Our Story: My water broke Tuesday afternoon. Garet and I rushed to the emergency room. There we found out that Aubrey's heartbeat remained nice and strong but an ultrasound confirmed that I didn't have very much amniotic fluid left in my body. The doctor wasn't sure if this little amount would be enough to sustain our little girl. He sent me home on bedrest with a referral to see a specialist in Tucson the next day. So the next morning we woke up and drove to Tucson. My mom and dad were with us. The unknown was scary. I was scared of what the future might bring. I already loved this baby that I had been feeling inside me for weeks. I was scared for the child. I was scared for myself. Mom, Dad, and Garet were a great support. I had a prayer in my heart all day. I knew I couldn't do this alone.
They pulled us back and did another ultrasound. I could see that that Aubrey still had a good heartbeat but, I knew something was still wrong. The doctor confirmed my feelings and stated there wasn't ANY amniotic fluid left around the baby. She said the baby couldn't continue to develope properly without the amniotic fluid and that I would have to be induced. If chose not to I would pose great risk to myself for infections and for future pregnancies. I was then admitted to TMC to start the induction. I was so scared, sad and heartbroken.
I continued to feel the baby move at the hospital with the little contractions that I had. Soon the contractions started getting harder and I didn't feel the baby move as much. After 5 hours of labor our sweet little Aubrey was born. She was a beautiful little girl. A little girl that I would not raise at this time, and a little girl that I couldn't take home with me. My heart was broken but when the nurse placed this little girl in my arms I felt at peace. I know that even though I long for her to be with us on earth at this time, I know that I will be able to raise this sweet girl once again. I am grateful for priesthood blessings, grateful for a loving husband, supportive parents, family and friends. I really appreciate all the notes/text messages/phone calls that have been sent our way. I am also grateful for a kind, loving Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
I know the next couple weeks/months/year is going to be hard but I know that with the help of my Savior I will be able to get through.

Pioneer Day

This year I was so excited for Pioneer Day...July 24th! A lot of my family came down and visited. It was so much fun. It was the first time that they had come to visit us! Usually we make the trip to SV but not this time. Here are a few pictures and a quick outline of the fun weekend.

Friday- late night bar b que.....Garet did a good job on the grill
Saturday morning- Boys went on a bike ride to Mt. Graham and the girls stayed home with the kids making hair bows and banana bread
Saturday afternoon- went to Angle Orchard and picked some apples. We really wanted some peaches but they didn't have any:(
Saturday evening- Went to the parade. It was really cute. The theme was something related to the Temple sence they are in the process of building the Gila Valley Temple! I am so excited to get a temple 2-3 min from our house!! After the Parade we went to eat at La Casita...YUM YUM YUM!!! Love it! We then went back to the fields and the kids played games and the adults visited! We then got to enjoy a fun little display of fireworks!!!
Saturday late night- Family all left
Sunday afternoon- Had a big dinner with all the Goodman family! So fun! Glad we got to visit with them this weekend also. Its not to often you get to see just about everyone of you family members all the same weekend!!!!!!!

Here are a few pics I stole from Marlees Blog sence I didn't have my camera with me!Waiting for the Parade to start!

This is a mock of what our Temple is going to look like! Isn't it beautiful!

The gang at dinner...minus Piage...She was at the head of the table and can't be seen!:) But she was there!

Our little campout at the Fireworks!!! The Fireworks were right above us. We had to lay down to look at them or your neck would get really sore!!! So fun!!

A Picture Can Speak 1,000 words

Happy 4th

I love the 4th of July. It is so much fun to go home and spend the weekend there. The 4th is so awesome in Sierra Vista and I get to see a lot of my friends that I grew up with because they all come home also. I love it!!!

Friday night the 3rd was my brother Justins 30th birthday. We met him and his wife Karisa at Texas Roadhouse for dinner. It was so fun visiting with them. Garet secretly told the waitress that it was his birthday so they made him get on the saddle and do a little chant. Justin didn't want to do this but was a good sport about it. I don't think they'll invite Garet and I to eat with them on their birthdays again..hahaha!!

Saturday morning we started off with a breakfast and a program at the church ball fields. It was a nice program...and the food was really good.

Saturday afternoon we took the kids to the "Cove" the city pool. It includes a play area for kids, a very large heated spa, a wave pool, diving area and slides. It was fun. Paige had a blast. Thanks Megan for taking her swimming!

Saturday night we went to the city ball fields to have a picnic dinner, listen to the army band play, and play frisbee, catch, tag..etc while we waited for the fireworks. Then the fireworks started. They always start off with the cannons. Paige was a little scared at first because they are really loud!! Then they had a wonderful firework display. Supposedly it consisted of over 4,00o fireworks, the largest display in southern Arizona. It was really good. Paige did really well and was actually laughing and pointing at them. Then....in the middle of it she fell asleep! She must have been REALLY tired from the days events to sleep through all the banging!!!

Well we went home Sunday night. It was great visiting with family and friends. We had a wonderful weekend!!!

Paige's first horse ride...she couldn't decide if she liked it or not.

Paige and Grandma Haymore

Little Patriotic Paige

Brooklyn, Halie, and Paige..enjoying pizza and chicken.

Grandma Lunt or.."Gamma Great" as Paige calls her with our little Paige. (On a side note... I love this picture of Grandma. Isn't she cute!)

Paige enjoyed the frosting off of the sugar cookie. Once the frosting was gone she didn't want the cookie!!

The thumb sucking...which led to this below......A sleeping little angel!

Mexico

Late...but better then never. The Wednesday after Dads funeral we headed off to Rocky Point... Mexico. The trip was planned MONTHS ago for Garets parents 50th wedding anniversary. Since we had all the arrangements already made the family decided to go ahead and go with the celebrations....after all they did make it to their 50th wedding anniversary. We had a great time. We were really tired from the previous couple weeks but it was still nice to be with the family away from the "world".

Paige, Makenzie, Katie and Kylee...Paige loved playing with these girls! She thinks she is just as big as they are.

Cousins playing cards on the patio

A few of the "beach bums"

Can't go to Rocky Point without hitting the "shops"...it was so hot that day we didn't stay very long!

Paige had such a fun time. She did pretty good at taking her naps at the beach house...but on this paticular day she didn't want to stop playing. Finally it just hit her and she took her nap on the beach!!!

We can't forget the "whale" ride. Garet said that it was really crazy this year.

M'lee, Renee, Me, and Laura, Robyn (not pictured) had already left for home

Our little family before going to church. This was taken on the deck of the beach house.

He really was a "Good Man"

These past two weeks have been a roller coaster for our family. I have put off blogging about this b/c I didn't really know what to say. Saturday June 13, 2009 Garets father past away. The day just after him and his wife's 50th wedding anniversary. This was an unexpected death. But when the news of Cancer came about one week prior to his death we were grateful that it did go fast. Thursday June 4th Garets dad was admitted in the hospital for tremendous back pain. Garet and his brother had previously been treating him and took x-rays of his back and found a compression fx. There is not much treatment you can do for a compression fx. It is much like a stress fx, it gets better with rest. After a couple days of rest Garet told his dad that he needed to go to the doctor if the pain did not subside so like I said he was admitted to the hospital for pain management. He received alot of pain medication at the hospital which did relax him a lot and made him quite sleepy. Friday they did an MRI and found evidence that he had bone cancer to the back. This was a fear of Garets b/c his dad had previously had a hx of bladder cancer. Saturday he remained quite sleepy but his kidneys started to fail. The Doctors then decided to air lift Dad to Tucson Medical Center. All of the family but 2 grand kids and one son in law were there to see him leave the hospital. We had lots of tender moments with him before he left the hospital and witnessed small little mircles. Before Dad left he was able to hold each grandchild and child (including in laws) hands and tell them he loved them each individually. It was very hard to see him leave but a very special experience for our family. In Tucson it seemed like his kidneys were slowly getting better, and a bone scan they did showed that there wasn't bone cancer. Our family felt that this was an answer to our prayers and truly a miracle. Garet and I were able to be with him Saturday night thru Monday night. He was still very sleepy but could answer most of our questions. Again this was a special time. Thursday they decided to run one more test just to make sure everything was improving as they seemed to be. However they then found that there was cancer in his liver and spleen. From these reports the Doctors only gave Dad a few weeks. During these weeks they said he would most likey be in alot of pain. Then that same day out of know where his kidneys started to shut down again. The doctors told us we could do dialysis but that would only save time until the cancer killed him. Friday morning we decided to bring him home with the family until he passed away. The Doctors weren't able to explain why his kidneys were shutting down but we found this as another tender mercy of our Heavenly Father. Because the kidneys are the bodies filtering system he wouldn't be able to release his bodies toxins and thus not be able to feel the pain of the cancer. It was nice to have him home with the family. Dad was glad to be home also. All the family came and were able to say good bye to their grandpa and father. Saturday early morning he left his earthly body and went to be with our Heavenly Father. His wife and kids were all able to be at his bedside. This was a very hard, but very special as well. His Funeral was a week ago Saturday. It was a nice funeral in which all the family was able to participate. Dad was a man loved by many people and a friend to all. Like an old saying says, "He didn't know a stranger, just a friends he hadn't yet met." We will truly miss our Dad, and Grandfather. He was a wonderful man and always willing to do anything for us. Paige loved her "Bampa" and misses him. Since we lived with him she really got to know him. Once they moved out, she still got to see him every morning. She now loves seeing pictures of him. We are sad that our "future" children will not know there wonderful grandfather in this earthly state but know they are getting to know him at this time. We are grateful for the Gospel of Jesus Christ and know that we will see him again. We know that because of our Savior this is all possible and are grateful for what he has done for us. Thanks Dad for everything, we sure love you!!!

Fun in the Sun

Yesterday I had such a fun day. I got a surprise call from one of my High School friends and College roommates informing me she was in town. I hadn't seen her in awhile so I was so excited. I had nothing planned that day so we got to spend the day together. It was so much fun. We took the kids swimming for a few hours and got to visit. After letting the kids take a nap we met back up with our hubbies and went and ate, got dessert and then came back to our place to visit more. It was so much fun. Thanks Brandi for the surprise call. I loved visiting and letting our kids play. Someday I hope you move here!!!